1. Is this going to be on the test? Translation=If it is, I’m listening; if not, I’ll just pretend to listen while I zone out about wanting to marry Johnny Depp and/or what to wear to Prom.

2. Is this long enough? Translation=I’m tired of writing this paper, so is this the minimal effort I can expend for a maximum payoff?

3. Can’t you just tell us the answer? Translation=it’s so much faster when you tell us the answer, then class might end early, then I can have time to continue my wedding details with Johnny Depp and ask Sally what she’s wearing to Prom.

4. Are you taking off for spelling? Translation=I’d rather not have to piddle with using a dictionary.

5. I turned that in. Did you lose it? Translation=It’s buried under piles of crusty sandwiches, crumpled paper, and dirty gym clothes in my backpack. I don’t want to look for it.

6. Why can’t you be like other teachers? Translation=You expect us to think. We like regurgitating information on worksheets.

7. You knew what I meant. Why did you take points off on this answer? Translation=I made every attempt to provide quality vagueness, and I think that alone should be rewarded.

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